The struggle is real

“you wake up every morning to fight the same demons that left you so tired the day before and that my friend is bravery”

Demons. . We all have them. Some of us fight them. Some of us accept them. My struggle with eating, over exercising, and extreme body dysmorphia are demons that I accept that I will have to fight for the rest of my life and every damn day is a battle.

I cant count how many days I have cried over my reflection. I don’t see my own reflection clearly. I see an obese little girl who doesn’t deserve to eat I see a girl who needs two more hours on the stairs if I am going to eat my egg whites I see somebody who can never work hard enough to satisfy my mind.

You may be asking yourself at this point “why is she sharing all of this? She’s a trainer she’s supposed to inspire us!”

If that’s what’s on your mind I can’t say I blame you. This is a very uncomfortable conversation to have with anybody let alone publicly on a blog But it’s my truth. And a very wise man, thanks Coachtopher, reminded me that my story may not just inspire but save somebody.

I struggle every day. Every time I have a meal it’s a battle. It’s me vs me. And it’s hard. Its unexplainably hard. It has brought me to tears many times. Yes, I am that weirdo who cries while she eats. Knowing what I need to do to get to my stage goals but fearing what that food can do to me. Many people are probably laughing by now or are at least very confused. That’s okay. I wish not for everyone to understand. Hell, I wish nobody understood. But I know some people do and for you I share this story. For you I fight. If i can fight this, you can too.

You have a friend in me You have an allie. You have someone who understands and will hold your hand and cry with you. (I maybe cry a lot, right Deszie?)

You’re not alone and misfit, officially or not, I am here for you. because We all have a little misfit in us.

Please feel free to reach out any day or time you need an ear that understands (631) 418-4631 ask for Iron Luck 🍀

love and light to all 💕💕